Category Archives: Interviewing

How Good are Your Interviewing Skills?

A+

Try this short self-assessment. You’ll  get a sense of your strengths and weaknesses as a personal history interviewer.

My suggestion would be to work from a printed copy. You can easily do this by scrolling to the bottom and next to Share this click the print button.

This is adapted from a larger self-assessment that I developed for use by our Life Stories volunteers at Victoria Hospice.

_______________________________

1. I listen to my previous recorded interview with the storyteller and make notes on additional questions I want to ask.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 2. I prepare a list of questions I want to cover before my next interview session.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

3. I can leave my troubles at the door and concentrate on the storyteller.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

4. I ensure that the storyteller is as comfortable as possible for the interview.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 5. I ensure that all audio distractions such as telephones, radios, TVs, and music players are turned off.

always            almost always                   sometimes                 never

 6. I try my best to make sure that there are no other people in the room when I’m interviewing the storyteller.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

7. As much as possible, I use open-ended questions which start with: Who, What, When, Where How and sometimes Why.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 8. I provide appropriate supportive non-verbal listening such as nodding, smiling, frowning, leaning forward, and maintaining “non- intense” eye contact.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 9. I use supportive verbal acknowledgment sparingly. This includes such expressions as: I see. Yes. Mmm. Right. Of course. Really. Tell me more. That must have been very difficult.

 always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 10. I keep an open mind and don’t mentally judge the storyteller’s remarks.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 11. I ask only one question at a time.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 12. If I don’t understand what has been said, I ask the storyteller for clarification.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 13. When appropriate during the interview, I recap what the storyteller has told me.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 14. If possible, I face the storyteller and sit no more than five feet away.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

15. I speak in a clear voice and loud enough to be heard by the storyteller and picked up by the recorder mic.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 16. If I sense resistance to a question, I don’t force the storyteller to answer.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 17.  I easily admit to being at a loss for the next question and suggest time out.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

18. When I become aware that a response by the storyteller could cause others discomfort, I pause the recorder. I remind the storyteller that others will hear their remarks. I then ask if the storyteller wishes me to continue recording or switch to a different topic.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

19. I’m comfortable with sad, tearful moments.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

20. For the most part, I don’t ask questions from a list, preferring to use it as back up.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

21. I’m genuinely curious and encourage the storyteller to provide more detail and texture to stories. I temper this with a need to balance time constraints and to honor the storyteller’s wishes regarding disclosure.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

22. If I’m recording potentially revelatory stories, I make certain that as soon as possible I acknowledge on the recording that the storyteller has given me permission to record this material.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

23. I know when I’m encountering emotionally charged stories that are beyond my ability and expertise to handle.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

24. I’m comfortable suggesting to the storyteller that the person might wish to speak to a counselor.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

25. I gently bring the storyteller back to the topic at hand if the person has strayed into material that is of little or no interest.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 26. If the storyteller begins to use the interview as an opportunity to malign someone, I stop the recording. I explain that this is not appropriate and that I will not proceed if the storyteller insists on expressing such comments.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

 27. I am more concerned at getting the stories behind a life than the facts of the story.

always             almost always                   sometimes                 never

28. At the end of the interview session I thank the storyteller for taking the time to share memories.

always              almost always                  sometimes                  never

_______________________

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email.

Image by iStockphoto

The 50 Best Questions to Ask Your Mother.

mother and daughter

How well do you really know your Mother? Chances are, not as well as you think.

With Mother’s Day not far off ( May 12), why not consider putting together a little recording or booklet about your Mother? The following questions are a good place to start.

[ Note: These questions assume a traditional family with Mom, Dad, and children. I'm aware that the wording of several questions might feel exclusionary for same sex partners with children. That's not my intent. The questions can be easily adapted to fit any family. ]

  1. Describe who you were as a little girl.
  2. What’s a favorite story from your childhood?
  3. What did you learn from your parents?
  4. How are you like and different from your Mother?
  5. How are you like and  different from your Father?
  6. Other than your parents, who was the most important person in your life when you were a child? And why?
  7. What’s a favorite memory from your elementary school days?
  8. As a young girl, what did you dream of being one day?
  9. How did your childhood shape the woman you are today?
  10. Tell me a story that involves you and your first boy friend.
  11. As an adolescent, what kind of mischief did you get into?
  12. Tell me about your first job.
  13. What did you work at the longest and what did you like about it?
  14. What didn’t you like about that job?
  15. Tell me how you and Dad met?
  16. What attracted you to him?
  17. What did you hope for in your married life?
  18. How did your married life meet your expectations?
  19. How are you and Dad alike and different?
  20. Tell me a story about a special time in your marriage.
  21. What have you learned about marriage that you’d like to pass on to others?
  22. How did having children change your life?
  23. What’s the best and worst thing about being a Mother?
  24. What words of wisdom do you have on parenting?
  25. What was an important road not taken?
  26. What have you been the proudest of in your life?
  27. Tell me a story that shows how you overcame an obstacle in your life.
  28. What would you say are your weaknesses?
  29. What’s a dream not yet fulfilled?
  30. What do you rely on to get you through the tough times?
  31. Describe a moment in your life that was filled with wonder.
  32. Who’s been the most important person in your adult life? And why?
  33. How would you describe your spiritual beliefs?
  34. What’s your view of an afterlife?
  35. What has always come easy to you?
  36. What are your three wishes for me?
  37. What do you admire about me?
  38. If you had one piece of advice for me, what would it be?
  39. What qualities do you admire in your friends?
  40. If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be? And why?
  41. What makes you laugh?
  42. What makes you sad?
  43. Whom do you admire most in the world? And why?
  44. What was the happiest time in your life?
  45. What’s unique about you?
  46. If you could change one thing in your life, what would that be?
  47. What’s the most amazing thing you’ve experienced in your life?
  48. Tell me something that people don’t know about you.
  49. If you had only one day to live, how would you live it?
  50. How would you like to be remembered?

If you found these questions helpful, you might also want to look at The 50 Best Life Story Questions.

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email.

Image by iStockphoto

How to Ask Questions that Will Unlock Life Stories.

locks

“A storyteller who provided us with…a profusion of details would rapidly grow maddening. Unfortunately, life itself often subscribes to this mode of storytelling, wearing us out with repetition, misleading emphases and inconsequential plot lines…The anticipatory and artistic imaginations omit and compress; they cut away the periods of boredom and direct our attention to critical moments, and thus, without either lying or embellishing, they lend to life a vividness and a coherence that it may lack in the distracting wooliness of the present.” — Alain de Botton (The Art of Travel)

______________________

Last week I wrote How to Get the Stories in a Life Story Interview.  I spoke about the need to draw on good storytelling techniques (i.e.,  surprising twists and turns, interesting characters, a sense of progression, etc.) when interviewing a client for a life story.

Today I want to focus on the kind of questions that will help unlock the stories.

What you want to think about as you’re interviewing a client is how do my questions help reveal the stories of this person’s life.

Avoid at all costs questions that lead to mind-numbing details that neither illustrate nor contribute to the story being told.

Now don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing inherently wrong with the minutiae of a life. But it must in some way enhance our appreciation of the overall story. For example, describing in some detail what an individual wore to school could nicely illustrate the story of how poor this person was compared to fellow classmates.

On the other hand, details about where an interviewee bought his shoes, what kind of shoes they were, their color, how well they fit, and how much his friends admired them will cause our eyes to glaze over – unless there’s a payoff.

To elicit stories  use prompts such as Describe, Illustrate, Paint, and Tell.

To illustrate, I’ve grouped together six pairs of life story queries. The first in each pair is  weaker than the second and on its own not likely to lead to much of a story. The second question is stronger and provides more opportunity for story telling.

Weak  “Where did you live?”
Strong  “Paint a picture for me of the place where you grew up.”

Weak “What did you do on summer holidays?”
Strong “What was one of your most memorable summer holidays?”

Weak “What is your grandchild’s name?”
Strong “Tell me a favorite story of you and your grandchild.”

Weak “What was a peak moment in your life?”
Strong “Describe a time when you felt on top of the world.”

Weak  “What regrets do you have in your life?”
Strong “Describe an incident in your past that you still regret.”

Weak “What was the hardest part of being a parent?”
Strong “Tell me a story that illustrates the challenges of being a parent.”

As personal historians we have an opportunity to turn the richness of a person’s life into an engaging and treasured story.

Remember the words of Ken Kesey.

“To hell with facts! We need stories!”

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email.

Photo Credit: DaveBleasdale via Compfight cc

How to Get the Stories in a Life Story Interview.

iStock_in the beginningWhat makes a great story? If you think of the characteristics of your favorite novels, you’ll probably come up with a list like mine:

o engaging characters

o interesting settings

o intriguing and coherent plot

o surprising twists and turns

o conflict and resolution

These same story elements also apply to non-fiction works like life stories or memoirs. One of the pitfalls that inexperienced personal historians  make is to forget this. Great stories engage the reader or listener.

A narrative that reads, “This happened and then that happened. And then this happened followed by that happening.” is not engaging. It’s simply a recitation of events, places, and details.  It’s boring.

Here’s how you can ensure that you get great stories.

As you interview a client, listen carefully and ask yourself the following questions:

  • Does the story have a strong sense of place?
  • Are the characters well drawn?
  • Is the story intriguing?
  • Am I drawn in?
  • Am I delighted?
  • Am I surprised?
  • Is there a sense of moving forward – a journey?
  • Is the storyteller emotionally connected to the story?
  • Is this a crucial story in the person’s life? Is it a turning point?
  • Does the story seem to have a purpose? That is, is it worth telling?

If your answer is “No” to any one of these, gently redirect the interview. Ask questions that will turn the “No’s” into “Yes’s”.

You’ll be surprised at how much more engaging your client’s  stories will be.

Guaranteed.

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email.

Photo by iStockphoto

Your Favorite Posts of 2012.

check mark

Here are the most popular posts of the past year. If you missed some of these, now’s your chance to find out what attracted others to these articles.

Do you have a favorite article that isn’t on the list? Share it with us here.

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email.

Encore! Personal Historians, Are You LGBT Language Sensitive?

The following article is reprinted with the kind permission of Personal Historian, Sally Goldin.  She is a member of the Association of Personal Historians and can be contacted here. 

__________________________________________________________

As a lesbian mother and personal historian, I’ve been thinking about the issue of LGBT invisibility in regards to preserving life stories.

Even though LGBT issues have become more visible and acceptable in this society, there are still situations where you can be fired, harassed, or physically attacked for being an LGBT person. I was clearly reminded of this because of the harassment and discrimination a teacher friend of mine experienced in the Houston Independent School District. In this YouTube presentation to the Board of the H. I. S. D. he describes the harassment he encountered.  (The picture clears up at 30seconds). This is a person who had previously been named Teacher of the Year twice in 5 years… Read more.

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email.

Encore! 4 Ways to Get Control of a Runaway Interview.

A weakness common to novice interviewers  is their inability to take charge of an interview.  Interviews frequently look  like a runaway train with the interviewer gamely hanging on to the proverbial  little red caboose.

Taking charge doesn’t mean forcing or dictating the direction of the interview. It’s more like riding a horse. Anyone familiar with riding knows that it requires confidence and a gentle hold on the reins. The same  approach applies to interviewing.

Here are four ways to keep control of your interview: … Read more.

Encore! How Prepared Are You to Interview Terminally Ill Clients?

Life continually challenges us with the unexpected.  And only a fool would attempt to prepare for the unforeseen. It does help though to go into uncharted territory with our eyes open to potential risks. Interviewing terminally ill people for their life stories is  satisfying, worthwhile, and often moving work. Though it does come with precautions… Read more.

Encore! My Dears, Don’t Miss These 20 Fabulous Articles on Interviewing!

A good personal history interview is like a symphony – complex, engaging, and harmonious. Over the past three years I’ve written extensively about the art of the interview and assembled these articles here in one convenient list. Enjoy!…Read more.

Encore! What Do You Do When Facing a Reluctant Family Story Teller?

How many personal historians have found themselves in this situation? You have an enthusiastic client,  an adult child who really wants her mom or dad’s  life story told, but the parent is reluctant…Read more.