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Life Stories and Palliative Care. When Time Is Running Out, What Do You Focus On?

July 22, 2010 · 3 Comments

At Victoria Hospice we’re into the third year of a Life Stories service for patients registered with Hospice. This is a program that I initiated and continue to be involved with as a trainer and a mentor for our Life Stories Volunteer Interviewers.

Among the concerns that have arisen for the Interviewers, one, in particular, has been problematic. What part of a Life Story do you focus on when it appears patients may have only a few weeks or days to live? Patients may initially indicate that they want to talk about the broad spectrum of their lives from childhood to the present. The reality, unfortunately, is that they’re not likely to have enough time to complete such an undertaking.

Here’s what I’ve suggested. The Hospice Interviewer and patient agree to start with contemplative questions first. These are questions that reveal something of who the person, rather than the details of their life. If time permits, they can always go back to talk about childhood beginnings and the important stories from their life. So what might some of these contemplative questions be? Here are some samples.

What would you like to say to your loved ones?

What has been important in your life?

What are you the proudest of in your life?

What do you admire most about each of your children?

What has brought happiness to your life?

What’s the most valuable thing you’ve learned in life?

What regrets do you have?

How would you like to be remembered?

What is it that most people don’t know about you?

What are you grateful for?

Even if you’re not involved with palliative-care patients, you may find yourself at times interviewing someone who’s very frail and elderly. There’s no guarantee that time is on your side. In such cases you may want to give some thought as to what’s essential to record. Focusing on more contemplative questions may be the answer.

Photo by Jill Watson

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Categories: End of life · How to · Interviewing · Life stories · Palliative care · Personal historian · Questions
Tagged: Interviewing, Life stories, Personal historian, How to, questions to ask, Palliative care, End of life

Are You Using Storytelling to Promote Your Personal History Service?

July 15, 2010 · 1 Comment

For most of the 190,000 years that humans have been alive on this earth, they’ve learned their most important information, including survival skills, culture, religion, etc., through stories. The human brain, in fact, is wired specifically so that stories, and storytelling, have a much stronger emotional impact than information that’s presented quantitatively or according to some other emotionless structure.

~ marketing guru, Michael Bosworth

It’s the right side of our brain that harbors our creativity and emotions. It’s where storytelling has its impact. People are drawn to telling their personal histories by such deep seated desires as leaving a legacy, capturing fond memories, or finding meaning in their lives. They’ll ultimately make a decision to engage your services based on emotional not quantitative information. If you’re not making “storytelling” a part of your presentation, you’re losing clients. In a BNET interview with Michael Bosworth he says,

The emotional brain is where the ‘aha’ moments happen. Where the “I want that” or “I need that” feelings happen. The buyer has “gut reaction” and an image that allows them to make an emotional decision, such as the decision to trust someone or buy something. They can feel it and see it rather than quantifying.

How can you use storytelling to engage prospective clients?

Here are four tips:

Start with a story from your own experience. Your story should convey the delight, poignancy, and impact that life stories can have for individuals and their families. For me, the story I previously wrote, When Small Can Be Profound, about a dying mother and her young child is a powerful reminder of the invaluable nature of our work.
Borrow a story. If you don’t have a personal story that suits your needs, then find one that does. For example, in How a Prehistoric Cave Painting Came to My Rescue, I found symbolism that spoke to my suspicion that storytelling is part of our DNA. Another story I want to use some day is from James Loewen’s book Lies My Teacher Told Me. He writes that in some African societies,

The recently departed whose time overlapped with people still here are the Sasha, the living dead. They are not wholly dead, for they live on in the memories of the living … when the last person knowing an ancestor dies, that ancestor leaves the Sasha for the Zamani, the dead.

One might say that the Zamani are truly dead for no one currently living knew them. What a powerful reason for ensuring that our loved one’s stories are preserved so that they might continue to live in the hearts of those far into the future.

3. Be a good listener. This shouldn’t be difficult for personal historians. That’s what we do! It’s important to listen for the stories that are behind a person’s interest in hiring you. Ask questions that will help draw these stories out. They might be stories that relate to leaving a recorded legacy or perhaps a document that speaks to their beliefs, values, and wisdom learned. Whatever it is, be assured that there are very real emotional reasons for someone wanting to record a life story.

4. Retell your clients’ stories. In retelling your clients’ stories you not only demonstrate that you’re a good listener but you also help reinforce your clients’ “right brain” reasons for wanting to record a life story. As Michael Bosworth says,

Then, and only then, are you ready to sell, because then you can retell the customer story with a different ending or a new sequel, with your offering playing a role in the story. It’s also useful to have a quiver of “here’s how I’ve helped other people” stories, so that you can help the prospect visualize a future that includes you and your offering.

What of your own experience? Have you used stories to promote your personal history service?

Image by Ronda Del Boccio

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Categories: How to · Life stories · Marketing · Personal historian · Tips
Tagged: clients, Life stories, Marketing, Personal historian, promotion, storytelling, using storytelling

I’m Celebrating!

July 8, 2010 · 4 Comments

This week marks an important anniversary for me. Drum roll, please!

Two years ago I launched this blog and wrote my first post. Since then I’ve written 310 articles and 41,365 viewers have visited the site. A big thank you to all of you who’ve dropped by. And a special thanks to those who’ve taken the time to leave a comment or two.

From the collection of articles, I’ve selected 15 of my favorites. These are not necessarily the ones that received the most attention from readers but they are the posts that I really like and I think deserve an encore. For those of you who haven’t seen these posts, I invite you to stop awhile and have a read.

What Do A Cartoonist, School Children and Life Stories Have in Common?

6 Lessons My Cat Taught Me About Time Management.

Are Your Clients Extremely Satisfied With Your Service?

When Small Can Be Profound.

How a Prehistoric Cave Painting Came to My Rescue.

Eight Lessons My Mom Taught Me About Marketing.

7 Essential Questions to Consider Before Offering a Personal History Service to the Terminally Ill.

Our Favorite Things Have Stories to Tell.

News Flash! Not Everyone Wants A Life Story Told.

The Introvert’s 12 Step Plan for Painless Networking.

100 Free Resources for Personal Historians.

What I’ve Learned About Getting “Truthful” Interviews.

Don’t Pass Up This Keepsake.

The Cluttered of The World Unite!

50 Fantastic Life Story Quotations!

Photo by Jule_Berlin

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Categories: How to · Inspiration · Life stories · Marketing · Palliative care · Personal Care · Personal historian · Resources · Tips
Tagged: Interviewing, Life stories, Inspiration, Personal historian, How to, Palliative care, Marketing, free resources

Why Are You a Personal Historian?

July 7, 2010 · 4 Comments

I came across this Annie Dillard quote the other day: “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” It got me thinking.

There are times when the humdrum of keeping a personal history business afloat and tending to clients’ concerns can leave me drained and questioning if this is how I want to spend my days. Why am I a personal historian? I tell myself that I’m helping families record and preserve their stories as a legacy for future generations. And I’m documenting the oral history of a particular time and place.

These are OK answers but they don’t make my heart sing. They don’t make me rise above the day-to-day minutiae and say, “Yes! This is how I want to spend my days!” So I dug a little deeper and I found where the gold lies.

I’m a personal historian because it aligns with four of my core values: independence, service, variety, and creativity. Let me explain. I enjoy the fact that I’m my own boss and can shape each day pretty much the way I want. I need to feel that what I do benefits others in a meaningful way. My work allows me to wear a variety of hats such as marketer, interviewer, writer, and designer. As a bonus I get to meet an amazing cross-section of people. Lastly, I love to create things. At the end of the day I can point to something I’ve worked on and say, “This is what I made.”

When our work is aligned to our deepest values it has resonance and supports us. Sometimes I forget that in the day-to-day business of my work. I need to remember where the gold lies.

Where does the gold lie for you? Why are you a personal historian?

Photo by Dan Curtis

Categories: Inspiration · Personal historian
Tagged: Annie Dillard quote, core values, Inspiration, Personal historian, work

How to Establish a “Life Stories” Hospice Program. Part Two

July 1, 2010 · 4 Comments

In Part One, I wrote about the need to be familiar with the academic research on life stories and palliative care. In Part Two, I want to highlight five other factors to consider when establishing a life stories program at your local hospice. If you want to be credible and succeed, here’s what to do:

Become a hospice volunteer. This is the route I took. If you’re going to work with people at the end of life, it helps immeasurably if you’re trained as a hospice volunteer. First, you gain experience and a level of comfort being with people who are dying. Second, it signals to the hospice administration that you are serious and committed to helping patients in palliative care. Third, and most importantly, you become a familiar and trusted part of the hospice care team.

Keep your hospice “life stories” work separate from your personal history business. It’s critical to your success in establishing a program to assure hospice administration that you’re not using the hospice to recruit clients for your business. I’ve been scrupulous in not mixing my business with my hospice work.

Find a hospice manager who’ll champion your idea. In most cases this individual will be the person responsible for volunteer services or it might be the manager of psychosocial services or spiritual care. This will be the person you’ll need to convince that a life stories program is worthwhile and complements other hospice services. This manager will also have to bring other members of the hospice management team on board with your idea. It’s important that you establish a good rapport with your “champion”.

Keep it simple. You want to keep the time and costs involved to a minimum, especially because you’re providing a free service. This is why the program I initiated at Victoria Hospice only offers unedited audio recordings of patient interviews. Do make sure that the Hospice covers the cost of any materials you provide.

Build in a program to train other life story volunteers. It’s inevitable that you’ll soon find there are more requests than you can handle. Besides, you’ll not be able to devote all your time to offering a free service unless you’re fabulously wealthy! Here’s another point to take into consideration. Ideally, you should be planning for a program that will continue even when you’re no longer involved.

Photo © Dušan Zidar | Dreamstime.com

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Categories: End of life · How to · Life stories · Palliative care · Personal historian
Tagged: End of life, hospice, How to, Life stories, Palliative care, Personal historian

Wow! More Free Resources!

June 24, 2010 · Leave a Comment

As those of you who frequent my site know, I occasionally pull together free Internet resources. Previously I compiled a mega list of 100 Free Resources for Personal Historians. This was followed by 20 More Free Resources for Personal Historians and More Free Stuff! Well I’m back with more free resources to help you with your personal history work. Please note I don’t personally endorse any of these sites because I haven’t tested or used all of them. If you are familiar with some of these services or products and would like to leave a comment about your experience with them, I’d welcome such a review.

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25+ Free Vector World Maps. “If you are in search of a high quality vector World map, then your search is now over. Most of the vector maps below are of the highest detail and accuracy, some have been designed specifically for designers and others to be used by everyone for whatever the project. They are all in either .ai (Illustrator) format, .eps format or .svg formats.”

Photovisi. “…a free and easy to use online tool to create photo collages. Select one of the many collage templates, add your photos and then customize by dragging items around. After the collage is finished, it’s available for download and print!”

Diagram Designer. “Simple vector graphics editor for creating flowchart, diagrams and slide shows.”

30 Boxes – Online Calendar. “…lets you connect with the people who matter most.”

Zoho. “… a suite of online applications (services) that you sign up for and access from our Website. The applications are free for individuals and some have a subscription fee for organizations.”

Wordle.“…a toy for generating “word clouds” from text that you provide. The clouds give greater prominence to words that appear more frequently in the source text. You can tweak your clouds with different fonts, layouts, and color schemes.”

Babylon. [Free Trial] “It offers text translation in 33 languages and Wikipedia results in 21 languages, all in a single click.”

The Levelator. “Do you believe in magic? You will after using The Levelator® to enhance your podcast…It’s software that runs on Windows, OS X (universal binary), or Linux (Ubuntu) that adjusts the audio levels within your podcast or other audio file for variations from one speaker to the next, for example.”

Apture. “The leading provider of context for readers and publishers. By adding Apture’s simple code to their website, publishers can plug the holes in their content and let readers open related background material, view related photo slideshows, or watch videos from these popular destinations, all in an innovative second layer that keeps users on the page. Best of all, it doesn’t require any editorial effort.”

toggl. “A helpful tool for freelancers charging by the hour who need to keep track of exactly how much time they spent on what task.”

Cacoo. “…is a user friendly online drawing tool that allows you to create a variety of diagrams such as site maps, wire frames, UML and network charts.”

PDFmyURL. “A simple, one-function site that converts any live Web site into a static PDF file–something handy for offline reading, long-term archiving, and sticking on PDF-friendly e-book readers like Amazon’s Kindle. It can also be a lifesaver, if you’re on a computer without PDF-making software that would otherwise enable you to “print” a PDF copy of your own.”

TribalPages. “Build your Free Family Tree website online. Invite friends and family to view or update your site. Each private and secure website is loaded with Photos, Charts, Reports, Maps, Relationships, Events and Stories. Just add names of your relatives or import a GEDCOM file and instantly create your website. Your site can create custom newsletters for each member with birthday and anniversary reminders, recent site activity and send them out every two weeks.”

Celtx. “The world’s first all-in-one media pre-production system. It replaces ‘paper & binder’ pre-production with a digital approach that’s more complete, simpler to work with, and easier to share.”

Pixorial. “… created to liberate the world’s video – to empower people of all ages to share, create and connect with friends and family through video.
With Pixorial, you can easily send, upload, edit, organize and share your video memories.”

50 Free Resources That Will Improve Your Writing Skills. “You will find copywriting blogs, dictionaries, references, teaching classes, articles, tools as well as related articles from other blogs.”

75+ Online Travel Resources. “We’ve rounded up 75+ sites to help you on your way, including travel search, deal sites, travel social networks and user-generated reviews. Bon voyage.”

20+ Free Press Release Distribution Sites. “We’ve gathered 20+ sites that will help you with getting your press release out in the world for free.”

OpenZine. “A publishing platform with web browser based tools that provides an easy way for anyone to make their own magazine, for free…To preserving the design experience of print we’ve created amazingly powerful one click layouts. You can even change them as you go!”

OurStory. “… is here to help you build and enrich your relationships and connections by guiding you (and others in your circle) to recall, write about, and illustrate life’s most important memories. In one easy-to-use, organized place, and in a rich environment that celebrates all of the stories – big and small – with the words, photos and voices that help tell about your journey, at the same time honoring your choices regarding privacy. OurStory delivers—finally—a way to hold on to life’s incredible moments, and to keep them in a place where others can share in your journey.”

Photo by Luke Stearns

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Categories: Life stories · Personal historian · Resources
Tagged: free, free resources, free stuff, Life stories, Personal historian, personal histories

What Would You Like? I’m All Ears!

June 16, 2010 · 5 Comments

July will mark an anniversary for me. It will be two years since I started this blog. It’s time for some reflection and looking ahead. As part of that process I posted a poll in April asking readers how many years they had been personal historians. I wanted to get a better sense of who was reading my blog so that I might serve you better. Thanks to all of you who took the time to participate. Here are the results:

How many years have you been a personal historian?

49% – 1 to 4 years

30% – 10 years or more

21 % – 5 to 9 years

I wasn’t surprised by the fact that almost half of you are relatively new to personal history work. What did somewhat surprise me were the number of experienced personal historians with over 10 years experience.

For the most part I feel that my blog content serves newcomers to the field quite adequately. Am I right? But I wonder about those of you who are experienced personal historians. What could I do to better support you? So I have some questions that if you could find the time to answer, would help guide me in the year ahead.

What would make this blog a “must read” destination for you?

What would you like to see more of?

Do you have a favorite post topic? [ Monday's Link Roundup, Rants, Free Resources, How to's, etc.]

What would you like to see less of?

Are the articles about the right length or are you looking for more?

I hope to hear from you and with your help make this a better blog!

Photo by hans van rijnberk

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Categories: Personal historian
Tagged: Personal historian, poll results, my blog, feedback

You Can Do It! Get Referral Partners Today.

June 10, 2010 · Leave a Comment

In a previous post, Lousy at Getting Referrals? Here’s some help, I provided several tips that could increase your referrals. A personal historian colleague asked me to expand on my suggestion, Develop a large network of referral partners. She asked, “I know that we can benefit one another, but how do they know? How do I persuade them to give me their time for free? And what does it mean to follow up with my network every three months or so?”

Here then is an elaboration on my earlier post on referral partners that I hope addresses my colleague’s questions.

This is a long term process. You’re involved in developing mutually supportive business relationships. It will take time, trust, and patience and not all your efforts will bear fruit. If you’re looking for a quick fix, this isn’t the route to go.

Create your “ideal client” referral document. It’s helpful to compose a sketch of your perfect client and the follow-up approach you’ll use with each referred client. For example, will you contact your referral by telephone, letter, or by e-mail? How will you introduce yourself? How will you describe your referral partner’s role? Will you send promotional materials or wait until you have a positive response? Will you meet with referrals in their home or in some neutral location like a coffee shop? This document will clarify who you’re looking for and it will provide your referral partners with a good overview of your referral strategy. Don’t forget to add a few testimonials to your paper.

Identify a referral partner. Start by choosing a business that likely serves similar clients as personal historians. Make it easy for yourself by identifying a professional you already use and like. Perhaps you know a financial adviser, accountant, or chiropractor that would be willing to be a referral partner. Once you’ve established this professional as a willing partner, you can ask for names of others he or she would let you contact.

Try the ” reverse introduction”. Over at the Duct Tape Marketing Blog, John Jantsch has a clever approach to starting a referral partnership. He calls it the Perfect Introduction in Reverse. You can watch John explain it in a short video here. Basically the idea is to start by contacting a potential partner, explaining that you have clients that could benefit from her service or product. It’s easier to start be offering something of value. For example, I’ve been in touch with a company that provides a complete package of services to assist seniors with moving. It’s still early but with time the potential for referrals is there. Listen to John Jantsch here for a full explanation of the reversed introduction.

Build a trusting relationship. Keeping referral partners is a matter of building professional trust. You want to be certain that clients you send to your partner are going to have a positive experience. Similar concerns exist for your partner.There are several ways you can go about developing trust. For instance:

Offer a free seminar for your partner’s clients. Invite your referral partner to do the same for you.

Write an article for their newsletter or website and ask for your partner to write something for your clients.

Keep in touch. It’s important to nurture and care for the professional relationship you develop with your referral partners. Here are some things you can do:

send a card or gift for every referral you receive.

participate in their charity events.

make regular phone calls.

send an article that’s relevant to their work.

In a nutshell then, getting referral partners is not about asking people to give you something for free. It’s about a mutually supportive relationship where each partner wins. And to make certain that the partnership is maintained, you have to find ways to keep in touch.

Photo by Search Engine People Blog

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Categories: Marketing · Personal historian
Tagged: How to, ideal client, Marketing, Personal historian, referral partners, referrals, Tips

Eight Lessons My Mom Taught Me About Marketing.

June 9, 2010 · 8 Comments

Mom at 23 in 1941

My mom is ninety-two and a wise woman. She never had much schooling but she earned her doctorate at the university of life. She has a homespun wisdom that on reflection has taught me some vital marketing lessons. Here they are:

Never leave home without being carefully groomed. My mom always leaves her home neatly dressed and with her hair carefully coiffed. When I’m out in my community, I occasionally encounter former clients or workshop participants. Sometimes I find myself talking to a stranger about my work. I’m aware that I’m a walking billboard for personal history. This means I need to look appropriately professional. No need for a suit and tie. But slouching around in sweat pants and ratty sneakers won’t do when you’re in the public eye.
Don’t forget to say thank you. It’s a small word that goes a long way to creating a good impression. My mom never fails to says thank you for a kindness shown her. She always sends a thank you card after receiving a gift. Make it a point in your marketing to thank clients. I send a note thanking a potential client even if we don’t end up working together. I also send birthday and holiday cards to former clients. It’s a special touch that people appreciate and remember.
Don’t waste time on ungrateful people. Mom is sweet but she’s also strong. If people don’t show some reciprocal kindness or interest, she drops them. There’s a good marketing lesson here. There’s no point trying to promote your personal history services to people who aren’t interested or don’t care. It’s better to concentrate your energy where you’re likely to get the best response.
Answer letters immediately. Mom is a dying breed of letter writers. She still pens several letters a week to friends and family. And what’s crucial is that she never lets a week pass before she answers a letter. People appreciate her promptness. In marketing our services it’s vital to respond to queries in a timely manner. It creates an aura of efficiency, eagerness, and professionalism.
Be meticulous. Mom never let a speck of dust settle on her furniture. Her home was always immaculate. Even today she prides herself in doing the very best she can even though she is quite frail. The marketing lesson is that all your print, audio-video, and website materials must be carefully designed and first class.
Monday is laundry day. Mom never multitasked. Each day of the week was set aside for specific chores whether it was laundry, baking, cleaning, or gardening. It’s easy to become hit-and-miss with our marketing. Make sure you schedule marketing time each week and stick to it. Better yet, why not make Monday your marketing day?
Be frugal and avoid debt. Mom was a child of the Great Depression. She never spent money she didn’t have and always looked for bargains and sales. She’s passed that fiscal conservatism on to me. I look for the most cost efficient ways to market my services. For example, this website/blog cost me all of twenty bucks a year. I avoid “gadgets” and constant upgrading and use my equipment and software as long as it still does the job.
Don’t put on airs. Mom can’t abide pretentiousness or arrogance. There’s a good marketing lesson here. Avoid overselling or hyping your services. People can smell phoniness a mile off.

Thanks, Mom. You’ve taught me well.

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Categories: Marketing
Tagged: How to, Marketing, Mom's lessons, Personal historian, Tips

7 Things You Can Do to Ensure a Great Workshop.

June 2, 2010 · Leave a Comment

**LAST WEEK to vote on my poll: How long have you been a personal historian? Click here to vote.**

Workshops are an excellent way of getting yourself in front of potential clients. Running workshops is something I really enjoy. Over the years I’ve learned a few things about designing and facilitating them that I’d like to share with you. Here are seven things you can do to create an optimum learning environment for your workshop.

Set up a comfortable workshop space. Nothing does more to kill a good workshop experience than a poorly lit room that is too hot or too cold, too big or too small. Avoid having chairs lined up with military precision. If possible, request ahead of time a U-shaped seating pattern. This provides for greater intimacy and participation. Also, ask for a room that will comfortably hold the number of participants attending. Finally, always arrive early to check out your room and make certain it’s set up to your specifications.
Greet participants when they arrive. I always make a point of welcoming participants and giving them a folder of workshop resources. This creates a friendly, inclusive atmosphere and allows you to get a quick sense of who’s attending your workshop.
Avoid telling participants what they already know. Remember that your workshop participants are a tremendous resource from which to draw. Adult learners bring a wealth of experience. Start with the assumption that your participants already have some experience and ideas about the topic.
Check out expectations. This flows from the point above. One way to find out what people want to learn is to ask them! Somewhere near the beginning of my sessions I make a point of asking people for their workshop expectations.
Build in participatory activities. Avoid lecturing. If you must, keep it short – like five minutes! People enjoy being involved. How many activities you can do will depend on the size of your group and the length of your workshop. If the group is small, fewer than twenty, use pairs or triads to get people engaged with one another. For example, in determining expectations, I divide the group into pairs. I ask each person in the pair to describe to the other what it is they most want to learn. After about five minutes I bring everyone back to the group and solicit their expectations. I then write these up on a flip chart. For a list of other engaging activities click here.
Create a safe and comfortable learning experience. Your workshop participants will, for the most part, be strangers to one another. They need to feel comfortable with each other before speaking up in the group. That’s why I design ways to get people into smaller clusters which allows participants to get to know one another more easily.
Lead by example. Your words, body language, and tone should read relaxed, attentive, non-judgmental, supportive, and open. I often start my sessions by saying, “In our workshop today no one gets to be wrong…including me!” I emphasize that all questions are legitimate and will be listened to respectfully.